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| The Milk Bandits :: Forums :: General Chat :: Humour |
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| Funny Jokes | ||
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Moderators: Mr.CopyCat, Dag^Jase, Wilk0, Havok
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| Author | Post | ||
| Wilk0 |
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Wilk0   Registered Member #14 Joined: Tue Jul 03 2007, 10:38PMLocation: Lincoln! Posts: 1121 | 4 people in the carriage of a train - an Englishman, a pretty young blonde girl, an ugly old woman and a Frenchman. It all goes dark when the train goes through a tunnel. In the dark there's the sound of an almighty slap, and when the train emerges from the tunnel the Frenchman is rubbing his face, and there's a huge red mark on his cheek. The old lady thinks "I bet that Frenchman fondled the blonde in the dark and she slapped him" The pretty young blonde thinks " I bet the Frenchman tried to fondle me in the dark, got the old lady by mistake, and she hit him" The Frenchman thinks "I bet that Englishman fondled the blonde in the dark, but the blonde thought it was me and hit me" The Englishman thinks "I hope there's another tunnel coming up soon so I can slap that French twat again" [ Edited Mon Oct 22 2007, 04:46PM ] I'm a Keyboard Hero boom  | ||
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| Wilk0 |
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| Wilk0 Registered Member #14 Joined: Tue Jul 03 2007, 10:38PMLocation: Lincoln! Posts: 1121 | another one, taken from have i got news for you last night. A Woman drove 2 miles before she realised she was the victim of sexist Joke. I'm a Keyboard Hero boom | ||
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| Wilk0 |
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| Wilk0 Registered Member #14 Joined: Tue Jul 03 2007, 10:38PMLocation: Lincoln! Posts: 1121 |  I'm a Keyboard Hero boom | ||
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| Dag^Jase |
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The Boss  Registered Member #2 Joined: Thu May 24 2007, 06:59PMLocation: Northampton Posts: 1276 | The above is a winn0r We shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills. We will destroy the bug menace & ensure that the human species is the only species. We shall never surrender. | ||
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| Dag^Jase |
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| The Boss Registered Member #2 Joined: Thu May 24 2007, 06:59PMLocation: Northampton Posts: 1276 | This virgin girl is on the phone and asks her boyfriend to come over and have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl announces to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to go out and make love for the first time. * * * * * * * * * Well, the boy is ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he takes a trip to the pharmacist to get some condoms. He tells the pharmacist it's his first time and the pharmacist helps the boy for about an hour. He tells the boy everything there is to know about condoms and sex. * * * * * * * * * At the register, the pharmacist asks the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family pack. The boy insists on the family pack because he thinks he will be rather busy, it being his first time and all. * * * * * * * * * That night, the boy shows up at the girl's parents house and meets his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm so excited for you to meet my parents, come on in!" * * * * * * * * * The boy goes inside and is taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents are seated. The boy quickly offers to say grace and bows his head. * * * * * * * * * A minute passes, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down. * * * * * * * * * 10 minutes pass, and still no movement from the boy. * * * * * * * * * Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leans over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious." * * * * * * * * The boy turns, and whispers back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist." We shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills. We will destroy the bug menace & ensure that the human species is the only species. We shall never surrender. | ||
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| hummingman |
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 Registered Member #20 Joined: Wed Jul 04 2007, 05:53PMPosts: 450 |  | ||
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| Rolo |
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  Registered Member #12 Joined: Tue Jul 03 2007, 09:13PMPosts: 333 | roflpwned  | ||
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| Mr.CopyCat |
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 Registered Member #1 Joined: Thu May 24 2007, 06:35PMLocation: London, England Posts: 623 | if i was marking that... A*  IIIIIIRRRRRROOOOONNNNNSSSS Perfection At Its Finest | ||
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| Dag^Jase |
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| The Boss Registered Member #2 Joined: Thu May 24 2007, 06:59PMLocation: Northampton Posts: 1276 | LOL i loved taht one We shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills. We will destroy the bug menace & ensure that the human species is the only species. We shall never surrender. | ||
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| TheDuke |
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TheLegand Registered Member #27 Joined: Thu Jul 05 2007, 02:57PMPosts: 671 | Too bad the stuff i get to correct is in Dutch. But some answers are hilarious. But the American dudes are funny as hell too.  [ Edited Wed Nov 28 2007, 09:27PM ] Presented in double vision (when drunk)  | ||
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| Wilk0 |
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| Wilk0 Registered Member #14 Joined: Tue Jul 03 2007, 10:38PMLocation: Lincoln! Posts: 1121 | next funny thing translate  i wrote some funny stuff on my advanced math alevel paper... like Pie Are Sqaured and stuff I'm a Keyboard Hero boom | ||
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| Flange |
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Twat Registered Member #24 Joined: Wed Jul 04 2007, 10:31PMPosts: 79 | Q. What do you call 20 lepers in a swimming pool? A.Porridge! I'm gay and in love with Mark <3<3<3  | ||
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| Wilk0 |
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| Wilk0 Registered Member #14 Joined: Tue Jul 03 2007, 10:38PMLocation: Lincoln! Posts: 1121 | Q. What do you call a fat dumb mentally and physically retarded downs syndrome affected Scottish person with rickets and aids and elephantiasis in his face? A. flange I'm a Keyboard Hero boom | ||
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| Spets |
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 Registered Member #8 Joined: Tue Jul 03 2007, 08:48PMPosts: 91 | could have sworn the answer was floppy...  | ||
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| Wilk0 |
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| Wilk0 Registered Member #14 Joined: Tue Jul 03 2007, 10:38PMLocation: Lincoln! Posts: 1121 | floppy..flange.. the both start fl good enough for me I'm a Keyboard Hero boom | ||
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| Dag^Jase |
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| The Boss Registered Member #2 Joined: Thu May 24 2007, 06:59PMLocation: Northampton Posts: 1276 | Me too. We shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills. We will destroy the bug menace & ensure that the human species is the only species. We shall never surrender. | ||
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| Flange |
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| Twat Registered Member #24 Joined: Wed Jul 04 2007, 10:31PMPosts: 79 | not me. I'm gay and in love with Mark <3<3<3 | ||
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| hummingman |
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| Registered Member #20 Joined: Wed Jul 04 2007, 05:53PMPosts: 450 | MORE | ||
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| Flange |
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| Twat Registered Member #24 Joined: Wed Jul 04 2007, 10:31PMPosts: 79 | hear about the new england manager, kate McCann. she's only lost one in europe. I'm gay and in love with Mark <3<3<3 | ||
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| The_Goat |
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Mop Wielding Maniac  Registered Member #138 Joined: Thu Oct 25 2007, 11:40AMPosts: 284 | arnt the real tastless jokes the best:)  I am The_Goat There are no new posts since your last visit. (You have read 8 of these posts.) best yet There are 8 new posts since your last visit. (You have read 24 of these posts.) | ||
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TheDuke02 Sep : 09:27
well, at first it was only me who raped the neighbour. It ended with hte neighbourhood.
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